well, the 4th day of the new year has passed. nothin much happy happened i guess. in fact all unhappy stuff happened. wad bullshit is thre to say further? life jus suck when ur new yr suck. a gd beginning is definitely needed for me but oh heck it. its not going well. have many assignments on hand i needa do. gonna piang like shit for e exams agn. nsew la huh. its ok. doesnt matter. these few days darl isnt feeling too well. same thing i guess like how i felt last sem. so her mood causes her to piss me somehow and when i'm alr pissed, i can piss even more. ha. i don bame her la huh. life's like tht.
ok now this is real shit. my cousin had a miscarriage. not exactly miscarriage but somehow shes too weak for her second child which is a lil boy. its close to 5 mths and for e past 5 mths, she was struggling with it. kept hospitalising, kept having to rest. cant walk too much, cant stand too much. sigh. and her water bag burst yesterday. doc say shes too weak for it and if she insist, her baby is gonna be born blind. sigh. my nephew. is gone jus like tht. and wads sadder is tht e baby has such great bonds with us even before hes born. everyone was feelign so weird e day before and even i had e urge to msg my cousin to ask her how she was. sigh. life is so fragile. i prayed every night for tht lil baby to be fine but i guess god jus has his own plans.
i jus hope tht now my cousin will be able to pull herself up instead of feelin devastated. i hope she wont have any depression and i hope her daughter will be able to understand when shes older.
girl : grandma, wheres my baby bro?
grandma: ur bro has went to a faraway place dear.
girl : oh . but when is he coming back. i have so much to tell him.
grandma: i'm afraid hes not returning anymore.
*saddens me when i think of it.