ok. my mood hasnt been good this whole damn week. stupid dad has to resign at this point of time. just because he cant get along with the boss. like fuck you la bloody asshole. forget it. say so much also pointless. asking him to tolerate is like asking him to be a monk, so might as well jus shut up. get scoldings everyday for nothing. hell nothing. bloody bastard. sigh. so much of cursings and vulgarities. wad in the world is happening to me la, hai.
i'm really very unahppy lah. cant really go out. cant really do this and tht. upcoming activities all requires money la. sian a thousand times. training camp costing like $45 ? aft tht is chalet which cost abt $22. its either i quickly go find a job, to settle my own expenses, if not i'll just get screwed. whatever la huh. i give up.
i'm like single right now. having a gf doesnt mean anything. its as though i have none. she doesnt acc me. she only talks about her stuffs. she doesnt even bother. her actions are just so contridicting her words. i'm beginning to doubt this relationship. drifting is the word to use between us. everything has to be about her. even when she has the freedom now, its not with me. i don expect her to do anything for me anymore. i'm just utterly disappointed in her. i'm sorry if ure reading this. cos thts just how i am feeling. sorry if thts not wad you think. cos u knw wad? I DON GIVE A SHIT BOUT UR PROBS ANYMORE. don bother praying for me, feeling guilty about me. cos i'm beginning to lose my trust and faith in u. i'm beginning to wonderif wad u said was true. u said u missed me, LOL. sorry but i don seem to feel it. go home as late as possible if u want. its none of my business. after u had ur fun, u start to think of me. what e shit u take me for? ur bloody soft toy. i'm sorry man. i just cant fucking stand it. so wad if ure still my wife now. do u even feel like one? even if u do, sorry but to say i dont feel that at all right now. it feels as though ure so far. so freaking faraway. so far its almost impossible to reach for u. every topic revolves around ur world. ur frens. jc. since ure like tht. why complain about others? do some reflection alright. we msg everyday. every min maybe. but our words are like " oh ok. i see. enjoy. oh alright" ask urself why all this is happening. i don care if u neglect me already. i realy don wish to care already. u never kept to ur words. forget it. being together is uselss to me alr. it doesn t even feel like. but since u insist. den i'll jus do whatever u say.